One of the two things which I enjoyed allot at PLAI was the presence of persons with disabilities. Since Friday and Saturday I was only at concerts, only on Sunday I haven’t had the chance to walk away through the trees, among stands, to go in court, to know anything else besides music.

I took our dog with us and we enjoyed the single sunny day of all festival.

Although I passed twice near the stand of persons with disabilities,  I didn’t stopped. I saw the benner on which who ever wanted to leave a message could do it with a colorful mark. I saw them in wheelchairs, I saw them moving hardly, speaking hard ,seeing hard. But I didn’t stopped or looked at them persistently. Anca volunteer PLAI, told me that the empty wheelchairs on the alley can be tried by those who want to feel how it feels to be in the skin of persons with disabilities. And the tinned are like some benchmarks through they need to pass, so that they could see how hard is for those who can’t walk. I went forward, but somehow I was with the regret that I didn’t wrote anything on the banner.

After I participated at a workshop of actory, before we go home we wanted to eat something. Food stands were near CevaDeSpus.ro stand. . I stopped at the panel, I was looking at what was written a boy. I’ve been studying what other people have written when one of representatives told me that I can leave a message if I want. I lost instantly. I told him I’d like to write something, but that I am  overwhelmed and that I want to think about some of what I am going to write. In the end, I took my courage and I wrote them with blue paint pen that I’m low ahead of them, that any disability would have to live their life beautiful. Or something, I don’t remember well. I had a little, and I was weeping. When Raluca thanked me and  she smiled,  my knees melt really. I leaned forward beside her tiny wheelchair, in the same way as her, and I asked her name and how old she is. I already joined the tears in my eyes and I was afraid not to say any stupid thing. With smile on her lips she invited me to a meeting in a place away from the people. So we could talk in peace. She gave me a cup of tea on a number of occasions and I have refused. I don’t know why, I think because of the node in my throat.

 

Raluca has 23 years old, finnished faculty of letters and now works for NGO CevaDeSpus. She likes to listen jazz and tango and has a sense of humor very developed. She doesen’t like when people feel sorry for her. She doesn’t want pity, and just wants to be understood and accepted as a human being, not as a freak . I’ve told her about my blockage, why I don’t turn my look and I don’t stop, why I wouldn’t know how to talk with a person with disability, why is hard for me to  come closer to someone who doesen’t stay in two feets like me or doesen’t move so easy like I do .I’ve told her what I wrote here:” Sometimes I don’t look , it’s not for me to pretend they don’t exist, is not because I ignored them, but first of all because I don’t know how to behave, I don’t know if it bothers them, I don’t know if they need to my eyes. Surely there are other glance that hurt them and I don’t want to make my own, curious, to send a wrong message . And then when they turn their head away, but I admit that I would look at them.”  She told me that it is locked in the seat with the wheels due to a medical doctor and a vaccine that ruined it for life, she told me that there is nothing left to be done for her. Then she told me of the difficulties that she  had been in kindergarten, with their eyes and with the words people who told her that everything she would  do in her life will be always  a loser, she told me about her mother’s love and how at 3 years she didn’t wanted to get out of the house of shame, such as her mother said her a few words which, I think, gave her the strength to prove them that yes, she can do anything she puts in her mind . Raluca  proved for a million times that people with disabilities are better than those without. That can do the same things, but in the harder way.

Cosmin, another boy who came to question a little later, is student in year two to social assistance. I told him that I saw him last week at the church and that the first impression and the first thing that I have told him that when I saw him was: “The poor”.  I was glad to see him again, to stay face to face with him and to talk without feeling sorry for him. To laugh at Raluca’s jokes and to tell me about all the activities their association make.

Daniela had told me how she persuaded  Otilia Craciun claimed in which she lives to build up a railing to take when entering and leaving block. She told me about how needs help every time she returns home with a taxi and how not all taxi drivers are willing to help her to get to scale. About how her friends of the association help her.  About how to fight alone and about how have been offered her money in the street, about which there are problems with rails in this city and many other problems that she experiencied

I could say a few things here: drivers of bus will not help them to climb, whether they be the seat, either on their feet. Do not have special wheelchair and if they have, are made highly bogus:  slippery surfaces, but I am too steep. What’s more, a lot of institutions in the city do not have ramps. City Hall is more enemy than their ally – anytime they ask for help, the city hall ii swept from a single desk to another or turn them back. But in the same time, from time to time they manage to give with their fist on the table and to do change something. With difficulty, however.

I have dedicated an article particular (and very long) because their voices are not heard and that it should be. Our eyes are not open, it should be. They don’t want to be viewed with compassion, they just want to be noticed and want to have rights that they are entitled and which they deserve. If ever you see a person with disabilities, don’t be afraid to enter into conversation with her, she would love to be able to answer questions and to tell least with you. So I have been told all: “We don’t bother to be asked, but mercy bother us”.  Curiousity of people shows that they care about. If you want to try, the associationSomething to Say receives guests  any time. They have a site and a Facebook page, throw one eye and dare to make them a joy.

I don’t look at them with compassion ,I keep this feeling for those who think that Timișoara deserves to be Capital of Culture in these conditions.